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You have a row. Relationship status: it's complicated. But how do you know whether love is really over and you should part? The 10 signals.
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In the past, we laughed, we loved. Nothing could frighten us, our future looked colorful and wonderful. But now? We have almost nothing to say to each other, we avoid each other, hearty laughter was a long time ago, tenderness and closeness hardly exist anymore. Is our love at the end? Is now the time to end your relationship?
It's hard to accept that a great love ends. That you have failed as a couple, that there is no longer a way to each other. No wonder we shy away from this step for so long. The hope that something will change, that it will only be a phase, that it will be the way it once was: love is slowly dying. Very slowly.
And yet: There are situations that pull a couple into a vortex from which they can no longer get out. We have ten signals that tell you whether you should hold on to the relationship. Or whether the train has left and a separation is the better solution.
What are signs that it would be better to end the relationship?
1
Emotional blackmail. One partner withdraws, remains silent to the other. He does not give any information, he cannot be reached for days. As a justification for his withdrawal of love, he blames you with feelings of guilt. YOU did wrong. Therefore I ignore you. This is what is called passive-aggressive behavior in technical jargon. One partner always has to justify himself, has to crawl and ask for forgiveness - the other holds the reins in his hand and determines the time for forgiveness. Emotional blackmail occurs in almost all relationships. But when it is used as a power game in every row, in every discussion or criticism, love slowly undermines it. Because the withdrawal is not about the lack of communication - but about the fact that you are being disregarded as a person. But not only the powerful withdrawal of love, but also the acceptance of the role of victim is a serious danger to love. "If you leave me, that's my end!" - Prophecies like this are a dynamo in the engine of negative emotions.
2
The fairy tale of time out. We have problems? Then only a break can be the solution. That thought is wrong. Because with a temporary spatial separation, couples do not try to solve their conflicts - they just run away from them. Quarrel must also be possible in love. When serious compromises are sought. Only then can a couple grow. A "break in a relationship" is often just a pretended solution that is supposed to postpone an impending breakup in a friendly way.
3
Verbal attacks. When one is angry, hurtful words are spoken. Hardly anyone is immune from it. But disrespectful behavior, verbal humiliation, sentences deliberately aimed below the belt: That destroys love. Also, things that you have told your partner in confidence should never be used in an argument against you. An absolute breach of trust!
4
You're just annoying each other. In the past you couldn't spend a second without each other, today too much closeness just annoys you. He wants to spend the whole weekend with you - and you're hyperventilating about this prospect? Are you annoyed when he just walks in the door (and throws off his shoes in the middle of the anteroom)? His slurping, his snoring, his face … suddenly you find everything just exhausting, annoying, annoying. When closeness is no longer perceived as positive but as a permanent burden, then love has come to an end. Because for a loving SMS, a tender gesture: In a good relationship there should always be room for this.
5
Affair and fraud. Yes, there are couples who even survive an affair. This only works if both approach each other, if they take responsibility for the deception and if both are willing to forgive each other. A show of strength that very few really manage. Because if one of the partners (for whatever reason) allows a stranger access to the intimate sphere of a partnership, then an extreme downward spiral has started …
6
Laugh? Once upon a time… Humor and the ability to laugh together: This is one of the most important components of a relationship. This is the only way to turn things around again in an argument, to feel positive emotions towards your partner, even when the going gets tough. If you can no longer laugh together, then your love is about to end.
7
There is no more sex. In every relationship there are phases in which one person wants more - and the other has less desire for sex. So there is no need to worry fundamentally. But if you no longer sleep together, if caresses have degenerated into a compulsory exercise, then all the warning signals should shriek. "How does a woman know whether a man has really lost all interest?" We once asked a friend. His answer? "If he doesn't sleep with her for several months." Sex is an important aspect of all love - if it is missing, then the relationship is also at a crossroads.
8
You just want to harm me … In a good partnership, you trust that the other person only wants what is best for us. That everything he does only happens because he means well. If, however, we begin to accuse our partner of having evil will or believe that he wants to harm us - then the balance of the relationship has seriously and permanently shaken. Because these negative thoughts are difficult to put aside again.
9
You don't support each other. Willingness to help, sympathy, interest? Foreign words in your relationship? Then there is no more love. Because a partnership has to offer the security that you support each other and are there for each other even in bad times. And don't give up when things get difficult.
10
We have nothing more to say to each other. In the past you told each other every little detail of your life, no matter how unimportant, now you sit next to each other in silence. Lack of communication means lack of interest. And INDIFFERENCE is the final and probably the most important signal that you should really end your relationship.
